Navigating the Complex Tapestry of Sexuality Through Journaling

Our sexuality is so much more than who we love and desire. It is an aspect of our identities that is dynamic, vast, and hard to sum up with a label. One of the discussions I find myself having over and over with my clients surrounds how we get to know this part of ourselves. This can be a difficult path to walk, with societal shame, pressure, and fear often lingering in the shadows. It can also be hard to grapple with the fact that this path may not end - it may be an aspect of your identity that you get the pleasure of getting to know over and over.

In this article, I wanted to provide a list of prompts for reflection. These can be something you ponder alone in a journal, with a trusted partner, or in therapy. Pick one that you feel comfortable and safe exploring and spend the time necessary to dive into it. If you are worried that this exploration will be emotionally overwhelming or bring up traumatic memories make sure you have the resources you need to take care of yourself. The answers to these questions are not often brief or concise and they may bring more avenues for exploration. I encourage you to lean into this!

12 Journal Prompts For Connecting With Your Sexuality

• What emotions do you want to feel when you are sexual with yourself or others?

  • Do you ever find that the answer is dependant on any of the following:
  • The setting
  • Your partner(s)
  • Your mood
  • Something else?

• How has societal messaging, cultural norms, and personal experiences affected your current relationship with sex and sexuality? What do you want to hold on to? What would you like to let go of?

• Do you feel shame associated with your sexuality? Where does that shame stem from?

• Who are you attracted to? What characteristics do they have that are attractive to you?

• Do you have a favorite sexual fantasy? Have you ever shared it with a partner(s)? Why or why not?

• How has your sexuality changed over time?

• Do you have a favorite sexual fantasy? Have you ever shared it with a partner(s)? Why or why not?

• What labels do you associate with your sexuality? How do these labels serve you? Are there any aspects of these labels that you struggle with?

• What do you wish you knew about sex and sexuality when you were younger?

• Have you experienced sexual trauma? If so, how has this affected your relationship with sex and your sexuality? Have you had access to the environment and support you need?

• If you practice ethical non-monogamy or polyamory, what drew you to this relationship structure? If not, has this ever appealed to you?

• Does the relationship structure you follow (Poly, ENM, Monogamy, Etc) affect your sexuality? Your identity?